01 March, 2011


sometimes i really miss my old life.

i miss sharing a tiny studio with levi in downtown long beach. i miss the little corner by the window where i always sat because it was the only place in the apartment i could get an internet connection.

i miss my old rooftop.

i miss the restaurant we used to go to where you could buy a huge pizza for $8 and sit and eat peanuts at the counter.

i miss when buying a cutting board was exciting.

i miss life without tv where entertainment came from playing cards and making stupid faces for the camera.

i miss when lily was the only kitty.

i miss when gretel was a kitten.

i miss how THRILLED OUT OF MY MIND i was to move into our current apartment.

sometimes i even miss life before i started therapy. i miss the familiarity of my emotions... even if they were out of control.

i love my life now. i'm happy. i'm emotionally stable. i'm married to my best friend, the man i prefer to anyone else in the universe. i have a job! i don't have to worry about where my next meal is going to come from anymore. i don't have to sit around waiting for life to start. i get to shop sometimes! i have cooking accessories in my kitchen! i can afford groceries. we have internet AND cable. i have my own little office nook.

seriously, life is GRAND.

but sometimes i miss the simpler life we had back in the "old" days when things were so hard. i miss the joy i found in little teeny tiny things. when you have more and you're able to do more for yourself, sometimes you forget to appreciate those little things.... sometimes it takes more work and intention to appreciate them.

sometimes you have to remember to be grateful and to love the life you're living.


  1. so happy I rediscovered your blog. I used to read it all the time in 2009, but then I stopped reading blogs all together for a while.

    I agree it's good to remember and be grateful for the little things. We're in our poor time period and it's fun, but it's hard not to constantly think about the "when we get real jobs and a house" part of life.


  2. i guess when life gets a little easier... it's best to make the little things count. even more.

  3. I miss the "hard" times sometimes too. I get nostalgic. I love my life with you though, Jasi, old and new!!

  4. i was in a similar situation after i lost my job + when scott was first starting his business. one of the joys i found was once we had our income back + some hard times and depression lifted, we could do more + have more. yet i tried to really only let back in to my life, things i really wanted. the experience made me realize what fulfills me + what doesn't + i'm able to better focus on those things now. those hard times were a gift in that sense. xo

  5. I, too, am trying my darndest to stay present and remember that after I graduate college I'm going to miss being a student. (but maybe not the hour-long commute...)



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