This is what my life has looked like for the last week:
I caught that super nasty cold that's going around. I don't want to point any fingers, but it was his fault. That little monster.
The worst part of this malady has been the night coughing. Ugh, pure torture. I CANNOT STOP coughing as soon as bedtime rolls around. I describe them as "powdery coughs." It's like I inhaled a powdery substance, and it keeps puffing around in my chest, tickling my throat, making me choke.
A couple nights ago, at 2:00 in the morning, the coughing was so bad that Levi and I started desperately searching for new remedies online (I had already tried every NyQuil type medication, two different kinds of cough syrup, cough drops, tea, hot water with honey and lemon, hot showers, cold walks outside, everything). One website recommended putting Vick's VapoRub on the soles of your feet and sleeping with thick socks on. Another site recommended dark chocolate. So, at 2:30 in the morning, Levi went to CVS to purchase Vick's and the darkest chocolate he could find.
As I waited, hacking my brains out and seriously gasping for air, I started noticing a fuzzy little aura in my vision. I was getting a migraine. Seriously, body? A migraine? Now??! I had already taken two Benadryl to try to knock myself out, so I was deliriously tired. And my stomach ached from all the coughing. I was dreading the nausea and brain-splitting headache this migraine would bring. The hole in my vision kept getting worse, and the coughing would NOT stop, so I hobbled to the kitchen with my eyes closed and decided that I would eat until Levi got back. Eating seemed to be the only thing that kept me from coughing. I sat in the living room in my robe with my eyes closed, forcing myself to eat gingerbread cookies (I hated adding more sugar to the mix, but they were the only thing we had in the house). Then I decided to make myself some hot honey water with lime squeezed into it... all with my eyes closed. It was seriously comical.
When Levi got back at 3:00, he rubbed the Vick's on my feet and put my socks on for me. I crawled back into bed and shoved some 86% dark chocolate in my mouth (sooooo bitter), forcing myself to choke it down (coughing is a great appetite suppressant). We started laughing at the ridiculousness of the whole thing - me blinded by a migraine preparing drinks in the kitchen with my eyes closed, Levi frantically running to the pharmacy in the middle of the night, then driving to 7-Eleven for lemons shouting at the employee in the parking lot on a smoke break, "DO YOU HAVE ANY LEMONS? I NEED LEMONS!" Everyone needs a little frantic midnight drama in their lives to spice things up every now and again.
So what have I learned from this cold?
1. The Vick's on the feet thing does actually work. However, I prefer it on my chest.
2. Coconut oil is the best thing in the world for a nose rubbed raw by Kleenex... even the lotion kind beats my nose up. I've been dragging a little bowl of coconut oil around the house with me, rubbing it on every time I blow my nose.
3. A bed littered with used Kleenex, cough drop wrappers, nose spray, and dark chocolate wrappers is super sexy... not. The sight does make me laugh though.
4. My husband is the best nurse in all the land.
5. Chocolate is good for everything.